This past week, four people I have been talking with online for a long time shared their feelings in a way that I felt obliged to write about. Hot guys with successful lives are struggling with depression and suicidal thoughts. They are not even scared of Coronavirus because they are already dead inside – and, as we know, the world does not stop just because we want to cry. People who only saw value in the number of likes, people who were raised to win the game all the time, are now facing the worst battle they were never prepared for: loneliness. Social media – in general – despite all its benefits, brought social anxiety, addiction, and an uncontrollable sense of competition and confusion: we are calling strangers our friends and saying “I love you” when we actually mean “good bye.”
Every time we meet someone – especially in the gay community – they ask some basic stupid questions: “Which gym do you go to? What do you do for a living? What’s your Instagram account?" After checking your number of followers, your pictures, and your friends in common, they can calculate how much respect they are gonna give. It does not matter who we are. We can be dumb douche bags, but if we have more than 100 K followers, for example... we are considered GODS!
Two things we should always have in mind: nobody is getting any younger, and this moment will never come back. E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G is temporary, and we should use this time in our favor. Life is a gift. Our body is our vessel. The money we have does not belong to us; it’s just our turn to spend it. Our friends are the family we can choose, and social media can be very tricky if we don’t set some boundaries. We have been prioritizing our likes – our virtual value – over the actual number of lives we can touch in real life. The need to go viral has surpassed Coronavirus, and there is no treatment or vaccine for such vanity. We are being controlled by artificial engagements instead of calling a real friend to check how they are holding up. We never know...each day we wake up could be the last day of our lives or somebody else's. We have no idea how much power we have to transform people’s lives just by saying “I love you” when we really mean it or by bringing positive solutions instead of criticizing. And if we need help, we should always ask; it is smarter to face a war with other soldiers than alone.
The world is going through a huge transformation, and, as expected, in every new cycle we tend to lose. Some doors are closed. Some situations need to be left behind; some people need to say goodbye: I’m sorry for your loss. But in every new chapter there is a chance to start fresh, to find a new version of ourselves, a reason to wake up every morning.
We are bigger than our “posts” and we should stop judging people by the number of likes or impressions. The grass is not always greener on the other side of the fence (or the screen) - most of the time everything is just a circus! And even if it were greener, we should focus on ourselves and respect people’s lives. Everyone has a different timeline. Sometimes we win, sometimes we lose. We can’t be in the trending topics everyday (and, believe me, you don’t want that!). In the end, we are all in the same boat, trying to find ways to be noticed, to be loved and accepted.
When likes and followers come quickly, it is a very big test. Those who have not worked hard to get any recognition in life and become “celebrities” overnight tend to have huge mental issues even in the short term: it messes around with their attitude. It makes them think they are ruling the world...they instantly become Gods until they are no longer themselves... and then – game over!
Written by: BRUNNO – Bruno de Abreu Rangel
Edited by: Daniel Franken
